Change This Fact
by TrixieMonroe
Summary: Things didn't go as planned for one miss Rachel Berry. WILL BE PUCKLEBERRY! Not M yet, but knowing me it will be, for various reasons ;
1. Chapter 1

AN:/ Slight Futurefic. Un Beta'd, but I do try, sometimes my mind just works faster than my fingers, so bear with me please. Enjoy ( I hope!) More soon, this is just the setup for the most part. Will be Puckleberry soon. :)

Rachel Berry looked down at the plain, white envelope. She knew _exactly_ what that meant. There were still a couple of minutes before glee started. She could open it now. She also could have opened it about a thousand other times since yesterday afternoon when she had gotten the letter. But she knew what would happen when she opened it. As long as it stayed inside the envelope there was still a chance.

Turning it over in her hands, she sighed and glanced at the door just in time to see Mercedes, Quinn and Kurt walk in. As they chattered, Rachel quickly shoved the letter back in her purse, zipped the bag and smoothed her skirt. She doubted they were paying any attention to her anyways, but she still wanted to keep her business her own. With a small sigh she watched as the rest of the club followed close behind. No time now. She let out an internal sigh of relief.

"So. Now that our seniors have finished applying to schools, I think it's time we get back to work. For some of you this is gonna be the last chance to win nationals. "

With that Mr. Shuester began to hand out new sheet music. With one glance Rachel knew she wouldn't need it, but focused in on the notes harder than ever. This was _her_ last chance. Which meant she was going to have to win. Rachel Berry wanted this more than anything. She needed this. Vocal Adrenaline was done. Jesse was gone, Shelby was gone and so was any chance they had at winning. Just to prove her confidence, Rachel smiled widely and offered suggestion after suggestion until she thought she could be satisfied with the number.

It was almost enough to get the letter off of her mind. Almost, but not quite. By the end of practice, Rachel couldn't take it anymore. She knew it was time to face the music and open the damn letter.

Slowly, Rachel shuffled up the steps to the bleachers. People didn't notice her there. She was so out of place it was like people just didn't believe she was there. Sitting down, Rachel pulled out the letter and flipped it over in her hands a couple of times. She almost backed out, but before she could stop herself, she ripped the envelope open.

"Dear Rachel Berry," It read

"I am sorry to inform you that we cannot accept you to New York University.

There were many applicants this year and the process of selecting students

was very difficult. We hope..."

Rachel couldn't read any more. That was it. Everything she had ever wanted lay in her hands. Too bad it wasn't turning out the way it was supposed to. She let out a long sigh, hoping it would relieve some of the pressure in her chest. All that work. for nothing. Sure there was a back-up plan. But Rachel wasn't stupid. She knew that it she didn't get out of Lima now, she would be stuck here forever. People didn't leave too easily. She should have planned it out better, but she was so sure. The only reason she had even applied to Lima was because her dad and daddy insisted. Rachel had agreed, but she had been _so sure_ that New York was just waiting for her.

"What's this Berry?" Noah Puckerman climbed his way down a few bleachers and snatched the letter, taking several seconds to scan it over before realizing just how important this would be to Rachel. He didn't care.

"Looks like I'm not the only one who;

's going to be a Lima loser." Puck sneered and dropped the letter again. He had really expected more of a fight from her. He was being a dick, but he was honestly happy to see Rachel get knocked down a peg or two. If the almighty star could be stuck here, it made him just a little less pathetic.

Rachel didn't speak. She just bit her lip and vowed not to cry. She had hoped to keep this to herself a little longer. But apparently not. That was just the kind of day she was having.


	2. Chapter 2

AN: Like the little nerd I am, I've been obsessively checking the stats and such for this story. The fact that people are reading (and even putting this on alert) is AWESOME! Once again, this is still getting things going. I just want to try and give myself a good setup before I get to into things. Also, if anyone would be interested in being my Beta, that would be super cool. Okay, here endeth the AN rant. :)

It had been two days. Rachel was still replaying things in her mind. There were a million little scenarios that she played in her mind. It started with her thinking about the "what ifs'. What if she had studied just a little bit harder? It wasn't like she didn't try. Almost straight A's...but maybe if she had pushed a little bit more. Spent less time chasing Finn. Spent less time in Glee.

It was hard to think about. She didn't know where she would have shaved the extra time from, but whatever she had done it clearly wasn't enough. Because she was going to be stuck here. She didn't like to think about it, but maybe Noah had been right. Maybe she was going to be a Lima loser. Rachel hadn't told anyone yet. Not even her dads. Still, every time she even looked at Noah, she wondered just how many people he had told. Things weren't as bad between them. He was loyal to the glee club, but she was sure he had told. Quinn certainly. If anyone wasn't friends it was certainly herself and Quinn. Puck and Quinn were always on again off again, but she always knew. He always told her. Or she just found out.

Rachel didn't think she could bear it if everyone knew. She was so embarrassed now. For so long she had been talking about being a star. That was the plan. The plan she and everyone who could stand to listen to her for more than a second had known about since day one. Not so much anymore...but she wasn't going to tell anyone else that. She was still an actress, even if she didn't have a future in it anymore. All she had to do was finfish the year without telling anyone. Who were people going to believe anyway? Rachel Berry, A girl with a future, plans, determination and...Everything. And who was Noah Puckerman. He slept with everyone, mostly mothers, had a mohawk, a nipple ring and was an ass all around.

Maybe she was being unfair...but damn it. She was didn't want to have to defend herself in front of everyone. She was tired of being pathetic to everyone. Being a star was the only thing she had and that was blown.

Rachel could almost feel her blood boil. She was going to make damn sure that nobody believed Noah Puckerman. She was going to try and stop him first, but if that didn't work...Rachel had finally learned to play dirty. If she had to.

The second the last period bell rang, Rachel bolted for Noah's locker. There was no Glee practice today, so she knew she had an exact window of time before he would be gone.

She tilted her chin up, balled her hands into fists and started her angry stomp to give Noah Puckerman a piece of her mind. Coming to a stop in front of his locker, she effectively blocked him from being able to get to anything in it without going trough her first. She had no doubt that he probably could, but she would have a lawsuit on him so fast, he wouldn't even have time to put on something nice for court. Just as she opened her mouth she was stopped.

"Chill the fuck out Rachel. I didn't tell anybody."

Her mouth had been open, but Rachel quickly shut it, and backed down with the glaring. She was more surprised than anything else. She really hadn't expected _that_. Some scathing comments or some ridicule. Maybe even a slushie...though it had been a very long time since that had happened.

"It's not like I care. It's not like anyone cares." With a small smirk, he used her stunned silence and immobility to shift her aside and get to his stuff.

Rachel wasn't sure what she felt anymore. She was even angrier now if that was possible, but on the verge of tears. She didn't think anything could have hurt more. Nobody cared. She sighed lightly. But still didn't speak. If she knew what to say she would. But there was no way she could even begin to know what to say. All her emotions were mixing.

"Fine." Rachel finally managed to stammer before rushing away. This was almost worse. What Rachel always feared more than anything was being inconsequential. Could Noah be right? Nobody cared. The thought was hard for her to stomach. Rachel spent so much time trying to be someone. Within the space of a week her world was falling apart. All the work she had put into everything...it was apparently for nothing.

With a small sigh Rachel climbed inside her car and drove home as fast as she could. It was Thursday, which meant she had to record, edit and post a myspace video. Just because Noah Puckerman thought she didn't matter didn't mean anything. If only she was able to fully convince herself she believed that.


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Okay, things are starting to get rolling here. A bit of update on the rest of the Glee Club. So hope you enjoy. I am THRILLED to get good reviews, alerts, and favorites. Seriously, I have been walking around smiling like an idiot because of you wonderful people. I hope you enjoy. A bit more angst, but I'll try to make it up later. Try the mental image of shirtless Puck. *drool* Oh which reminds me, I don't own stuff, other people do. Okay, rant over.

If anything not getting what she wanted only made Rachel more determined. Problem was, she wasn't exactly sure where to go from here. In Glee it was always more practice, and showing people that she was right. For such a small girl, she was full of drive. But now, she just wasn't sure how she would, or even could do anything. This was a new feeling for her.

It was getting hard to hide from her dad's too. They knew she had been expecting the letter. She had only been mentioning it almost every day. They weren't stupid. Rachel knew they had probably figured it out, but hiding it from them felt wrong. This was just so strange. Every time Rachel thought about NYU, which was more often than not. Even music wasn't enough to distract her now. It just hurt so much, and she worried that her dads would be disappointed in her. Most of the time, they were the only ones who supported all of her admittedly wild dreams. Now she had to tell them.

But it was time. By now Rachel had worried so much that it couldn't possibly hurt to tell them. Rachel waited patiently for six o clock. Her dads were like clockwork. Mark would get home at six, followed by David at six ten. It had been that way for years. Daddy, Mark would come inside, set down his suitcase, go upstairs to change, come back down and start setting up for dinner. Dad, David, would bring home the takeout.

By six thirty, they sere settled at the table. Rachel took a deep breath and began to explain that no, this was not the end of the world, the state university was perfectly acceptable and that she still planned to study theater and music, and hoped to reapply to NYU in the fall.

The speech was flawless, but she still hadn't convinced herself. Her dad's were reassuring as they could be. They seemed to believe, her. But Rachel found herself getting cold when they began to comfort her. Suddenly that was the last thing she wanted. She just didn't know what it was supposed to do. What she wanted to do was move past it the best that she could. Why dwell on the past. Rachel needed to push forward just like always.

At school, she didn't talk much about school, and nobody bothered her about it. She was torn between being grateful that she didn't have to explain herself or give what she had now dubbed "the speech" to anyone. But it also confirmed what Noah had said. Nobody cared.

Outside, Rachel tried to be cool, calm and persistent, but inside, she simply didn't know. She _wanted_ to be the way that she acted, and apart of her was. But she was also scared and upset. What she needed was someone to talk to.

Options for that weren't great. Glee was better than it had been. She was close to everyone, and they had stood by her more often than she had ever expected, but she still wasn't exactly _friends_ with anyone. Finn was close, but she could never truly get over him. Finn would always be the first boy that she had loved. Still, they just hadn't made it work. He was always comfortable, but part of it was that he did believe in her. Back when nobody else did. Rachel hated to think of herself failing in front of him.

But he was the first to notice something was wrong. He

"Rachel, hey, uh..." Finn had never exactly been comfortable with these sorts of conversations, but Rachel was glad that he tried. "Are you okay?"

She shot a look at Noah, checking to see if he had any sort of reaction. As much as it pained her, Rachel was starting to believe him. Still, it didn't mean he wasn't malicious. So she was wary. Then again, Finn and Noah had never been able to completely recover either. Everyone was growing up and changing, and there she was feeling stuck and lost. Thankfully he wasn't looking back.

"I'm fine, Finn." She smiled at him. "Thanks for asking." She really did mean that. Finn cared, and that was enough for Rachel when it came to the people in high school. It always had been. But telling him hadn't been part of her 'don't tell anyone and figure the rest out later' plan. Some part of Rachel still hoped that there had been a mistake

"Good." He stood in front of her for a moment, awkwardly. "Hey," he began again, face brightening. "I got into Nebraska!" Rachel really didn't know anything about the school other than what Finn had told her, which amounted to it was a great football school willing to give him a scholarship.

"That's great Finn!" She jumped up once before hugging him tightly. She was proud of how far he had come, truly. She knew he would never exactly be the smartest guy in the world, but he truly did work hard and he deserved something good.

After their encounter Finn went to talk to Kurt about his news. Since Burt Hummel had married Carol Hudson the two had worked out a lot of their issues. She knew that it was still...tense between them...but Kurt had really helped Finn work for some arts scholarships. Kurt might not have had the most kosher of motives, but all was well that ended well there.

Over the next few days news began to filter in on everyone else. Mercedes was off to Chicago, Tina to Oregon, Kurt to LA, Brittany and Santana would only say "nowhere near any of you losers" and everyone else was still deciding. Then there was herself and Puck. Stuck here. She knew she had worked as hard as she could, but she wondered about Puck. The day Quinn announced she was going to Arizona, it officially meant that it was just the two of them.


	4. Chapter 4

AN: Thanks again for the support from you guys! Today, I bring you...interaction of Puck and Rachel! It's getting there...I promise. :)

Still don't own stuff.

Rachel Berry wanted answers. Noah had never had a ton of ambition. True, he wanted to be a good father, and for a time, was loyal to Quinn and for about a week, to Rachel herself. But when it came to himself, Noah was always something of an underachiever. But she knew he never wanted to be a "Lima loser". So why did he let himself? She thought that maybe if she heard it from someone who had chosen to stay her, for whatever reason, she could understand better.

Still, she was weary going into any more encounters with Noah Puckerman. Though he made numerous attempts to prove he wasn't her friend, and she accepted that, she figured that this was a small enough town that they would still be seeing something of each other. Maybe he could even help her adjust. God knew she needed it. Slowly reality was sinking in. No matter how much she tried to push it away. But to the world, Rachel was a front of denial. There was no reason for anyone to know what they didn't need to. But Noah already knew. And was apparently keeping it that way. Which meant he was the only one who she could even approach about this disaster.

Taking in a deep breath she pushed her way past everyone to get to him before he left.

For the second time in as many weeks, Noah saw Rachel Berry rushing over to him. He wished there was a hope of escape from her. Right now he didn't need some "We're stuck here so we need to stick together" speech. He had no idea what it was that she didn't get, but if she didn't want to take if off, he didn't have a lot to say to her. He didn't mind her some of the time, but mostly, she just sort of...confused him. Puck was a bad ass motherfucker. He got in the pants of everyone he possibly could. Except Rachel. It wasn't like they spent any real time together...but Rachel was Rachel Berry. So, he wasn't looking to get too friendly with her. He didn't want to console her, though the more often she kept doing this to him, he did want to get under her skin. Taking a glace at the skirt she was wearing today, he decided that maybe he wouldn't mind getting under her skin in more ways than one.

As coolly as she could, Rachel sauntered up to Noah. She decided that she would catch more flies with honey than she would with vinegar. Sadly, he seemed to have relatively the same mind frame, though she doubted his intentions with _that_ look were anything but pure. It wasn't like that was the first time she had seen it. Still, Rachel couldn't help but feel a small tingle shoot down he spine. She knew full well her stock wasn't the highest in the school, so it was nice to know that someone at least found her a little bit attractive, even if it was Noah Puckerman. She had been there once, and near there several times after. There was no denying the chemistry between them, but she had always had more important things to think about than sex. She needed to know what exactly had laded her in this situation. She still had roughly four months to change something.

"Noah, I know you don't care about my unfortunate circumstances, with regard to my future education, however, as I've chosen not to inform everyone else and could use..." Rachel didn't know exactly what she was looking for. Answers, yes, but there were too many, and not enough questions at the same time.

Thankfully, Puck had heard enough of Rachel's speech. But the look in her eyes... He didn't pay that much attention to her, but Puck wasn't heartless, and it was a look he hadn't quite seen on her before. Annoying as Rachel could be, the look wasn't self pitying, or sad. She actually, for once in her life, looked lost. Something he could actually understand.

"You have five minutes." He may or may not hold her to that time limit.

"Okay. Can we..."

"Yeah. Don't want to be seen talking to you in public." His bitterness was sprung partly from the immediate situation, but he really didn't need to talk about his future. Honestly, it was nice to know someone so ambitious (and god help him if he ever admitted it to her) but talented would be here. Along with telling Rachel she was talented, Puck also never planned on admitting that he had applied to as many schools outside of Ohio as he possible could have. Some had even accepted him, but it just didn't work out. Money wasn't overflowing for his family, and he hadn't really qualified for scholarships. In the end he was lucky to be going to school at all.

With a sigh Rachel began to walk towards the auditorium. Still not used very often by anyone but the Glee club. Sure enough, Rachel pushed the doors open to a completely empty room. She looked back at Noah and gestured for him to go in first. She didn't want him to back out of their talk.

Once she had settled herself in, Rachel tried to find the right words and the right place to begin.

"You know what..." Rachel bolted. If she tried to talk this out it would mean that she was accepting her fate. She couldn't do that. Wouldn't do that. There always had to be some option. Rachel firmly believed that she could do _anything. _So she was _going _to fix this situation.

Noah watched as the brunette stormed out the door. Maybe he really was alone in this.


	5. Chapter 5

AN:/ Still cannot say thank you enough to everyone for reading, and reviewing. Thanks for the time you put into feeding my ego in such a manner. :)

Sorry this took a bit longer, for some reason, I was having trouble with this chapter, so if it seems off, that's why. But feel free to let me have it anyways.

And now, onwards we go!

[ONE MONTH LATER]

Puck was tired of watching Rachel Berry. He knew better than to think when she bailed on their talk that day that she would leave him alone. Maybe it wasn't in the way he had expected...but she was like a train wreck. He had seen her work herself even harder than she had before in everything. Once he overheard her babbling away to Finn about how she wasn't getting her full eight hours anymore, down to four. Christ, she was probably back on he "vitamin D". Puck didn't want to get involved, but he could see she was heading for a big crash and burn.

Rachel had tried she really had, but she was a stubborn girl. Her lesson wasn't learned yet, and though she had tried to find late admissions, she was still prideful. Rachel had refused to look outside of New York. She knew it was a long shot. She was on waitlists, but there wasn't much else to do. It was only a matter of time. But Rachel was in full denial. She had to believe that there was some way she could make it to New York. There was no other place in the world that she could see herself. Rachel needed New York.

Every day she trudged into school and held her head up high. She wasn't going to end up here. Noah may have been fine with just anything, but Rachel wasn't content to just let this happen. If she was going down, which she wasn't, she was going to put up a fight. She always did. Her determination and hard work had led the Glee club to two nationals (nevermind the fact that they didn't win) and she could do the same with college. There was no doubt in her mind that she could do this. She was Rachel Berry. She was _going _to be a star. How could anyone not believe her. If there was one thing she achieved in high school, it was making sure that everyone believed her when she said she was going to be famous.

So Rachel waited impatiently, checking online every half an hour, and the rushing to the mailbox as often as she could. Rachel had that spark back. She was going to change her future. She just had to.

But some things were out of her hands. despite her best efforts, Rachel was waitlisted, or denied. It was too late...Somehow, she was going to have to stay here. Not going to school was an unspeakable choice for Rachel. So she was left with Lima. It had to be better than nothing.

Once she realized that, Rachel wasn't sure what to do anymore. There wasn't anything else to strive for. Everything she had worked for culminated to this. But did it matter? She had worked so hard. For this. She knew it could have been worse, but for this? Rachel didn't know what to do or think. She sunk rapidly back into her lost, confused state. But somehow, she didn't care. What was the point of being upset? It wouldn't change anything. Rachel was determined to push all of this to the back of her mind and focus on Glee and nationals. It was almost working...

...Until graduation began to become an issue. Rachel once again found herself staring down at a sheet of paper she didn't want people to get a look at. In two weeks she would have to send out graduation announcements. Then she would be walking to receive her diploma, at which time they would announce just where she had "chosen" to attend school. She was keeping it under wraps until one not so lucky glee practice.

"So, Rachel." Rachel snapped out of her bubble of thought, to look up and see Quinn standing beside her chair. "What is it that's keeping you from bragging to us all about whatever fabulous school you're going to?" She arched one eyebrow and sneered slightly.

Rachel had thought she and Quinn had made their peace. She was never going to be best friends with her, and outside of Glee she and Quinn had nothing to say or do with each other. But they would never be friends. Rachel tried to reach out, but Quinn always knew that any reasons Rachel had for doing so were at least somewhat selfishly motivated. But the look in her eyes...Rachel knew Quinn knew. But Rachel wasn't going down without a fight.

Rachel opened her mouth, ready to lie. But it wasn't something she could do so easily. Quickly she looked away. Quinn nodded and made her way to her usual seat, next to the person Rachel knew had given her up. Even if it was just in her mind, Rachel felt like a spotlight was shining on her. For once, she wished it would disappear. She didn't know who else had been watching, or listening, but she now felt entirely exposed and embarrassed. People were going to have to find out sometime. Rachel had just hoped that she had gotten lucky with this encounter.

In the seat behind Rachel, Finn tried to focus on anything but the two girls in front of him. He and Quinn were completely over, and Rachel was a friend, at the least. But the two talking still made him uncomfortable. He couldn't help it. He tried to avoid it, but Finn tuned in enough to realize that there was no New York for Rachel. He knew her, and he knew that she wouldn't lie if she could help it, but she wasn't going to say anything. After Glee, Finn went to talk to her.

"Rachel!" 

Rachel knew that Finn was going to bring something up she didn't want to discuss. Given her earlier encounter, she had a good idea of just what it was. She stopped and waited for Finn to catch up to her. Taking a deep breath, she turned to face him and deal with whatever it was he wanted to talk to her about.

"You're going to New York right?"

"Of course Finn." She paused. "Just not...right away. It's complicated and some things just didn't work out the way I had hoped..." Rachel looked up at Finn, trying to come off as cold and composed as possible.

Finn didn't say anything for a moment. He wasn't sure how to react to her. He could see that this wasn't Rachel. He should have noticed it sooner, but this wasn't Rachel. Finn never was able to completely handle all of Rachel's chick moods, but this was almost scary. Before anything else could be said, Rachel turned and left Finn standing alone in the hall.

Puck stood just far enough away from Rachel and Finn to go unnoticed, but close enough so that he could hear what he needed to. He hadn't meant to tell Quinn. It had just sort of happened. People were going to find out soon anyways. Puck didn't know what Rachel was planning on doing about that. He knew he had bought himself a bitching out. The moment Rachel turned away from Finn, Puck sucked in a breath and prepared himself for the impending lecture.

Rachel strode past Puck without a second glance. What did she expect from him, if not that? It was amazing he had been silent this long.


	6. Chapter 6

Puck honestly felt bad for telling Quinn about Rachel. He had meant what he said when he said that no one cared...Honestly he couldn't even remember how it had come up, but the point was, Quinn hadn't forgotten. The girl was scary good at remembering stuff like that and using it when it was least convenient. But what scared Puck most was that Rachel hadn't said a word about it to him. He had first hand experience proving that Rachel usually gave anyone who pissed her off an earful. While Puck was glad for the silence, he couldn't help but worry that something more serious was going on. Worried, but not that worried. He had also proven that he could more than handle Rachel Berry's crazy. There were other, far more important things on his mind...like certain cheerio's and their stupidly short skirts.

Meanwhile Rachel wasn't sure how she was going to show her face at McKinley again. She was used to being humiliated, often publically. But this...Her fabulous life of stardom was supposed to be the payoff to all of that...bullshit. Rachel wasn't sure of anything anymore. So she worked hard not to care. After all, if she was stuck here, not much mattered anymore. Stars weren't made in Lima. They might be born there. It was a great story after all. Big talent from a small town...but it didn't work if the big talent stayed in the small town. So what was the point of being the good girl Rachel Berry anymore? Admittedly most of it was just her personality, but maybe that was what needed to change. Rachel knew she was irritating. How could she forget? She was reminded almost every day. But it was supposed to get her somewhere...

Graduation day dawned sunny and warm, just like she always imagined it would. Rachel had managed to avoid being asked questions by the rest of the Glee club. Mostly because they hadn't asked, but she tried very hard not to take that to heart. After all, Noah Puckerman couldn't be right about that. People had to care. Rachel needed them to.

Starting from the moment she came downstairs Rachel's dads took picture after picture to put in the latest scrapbook. She wasn't sure how many special memories she wanted about this day, but it was nice to see that they still were proud of her. So she smiled sweetly and tried to muster as much excitement as she possibly could.

Everything hit her the moment her name was called to walk up and receive her diploma. As Principal Figgins announced that she would be attending the University of Ohio: Lima, Rachel's heart sank. As sad as she had been before, something finally clicked with her. This was the way it was going to be. Nothing was going to change now. She spent the rest of the ceremony trying not to cry. Nobody looked her way and for once, Rachel was glad.

Puck was glad to be going to college at all. He didn't try very hard in school and really didn't have the best record. But somehow, he had gotten here. He didn't think his mother would ever stop snapping photos. He was happy. But as he walked past Rachel, he took the smallest of glances.

After more hugs, kisses, photos and celebration with her dads and the Glee club, Rachel set out to the Senior party. She wasn't sure how school sanctioned it was, but every year someone had a huge post graduation party for everyone. Rachel figured she would show up for a little while, say her goodbyes to some people, and leave the rest to individual graduation parties.

Upon arrival she scanned the room for familiar faces. The crowded house was full of already half drunk people , some completely drunk people and pounding music. Making her way through the crowd, Rachel stopped to chat with several members of the Glee club before making her way to the back porch. Outside was all but empty, and she could feel herself breathing easier now that she was away from it all. She didn't have to worry about explaining herself now. And for the first time since getting the news that she wouldn't be going to New York at the end of the summer, Rachel Berry felt hot tears fall out of her eyes and down her face. She was starting to pity herself again.

Puck grabbed a bottle of champagne, a couple of glasses and went to find Quinn. He figured they should celebrate together. After all, they had had the kid, named her, dated, been in love...sort of...broken up...and the rest was history. If he owed anyone a non-sex related drink, it was Quinn. As he weaved his way though the party, Puck was offered several shots, and by the time he found Quinn, he was already feeling fuzzy.

Once he found the blonde cheerleader, they hugged briefly, congratulated each other and turned away. Quinn was his real tie to high school. He still wondered about their daughter from time to time, and he did love Quinn. Just not in that way anymore. Now that they had made their peach, high school felt normal.

"Drink?" An almost mocking voice from somewhere behind he asked. Noah leaned against the doorframe.

She shot him an irritated look, before softening.

"Why not?" She extended a hand, which was promptly replaced with a glass full of champagne.

Puck raised his eyebrows in surprise, but didn't question her. Rachel Berry needed a drink, probably more than anyone.

Rachel silently drank her champagne and watched as the stars began to flicker to life in the sky. She hadn't really stopped crying, but she figured Noah wasn't saying anything for various reasons.

In silence they sat together, drank champagne, in a sort of bittersweet celebration.


	7. Chapter 7

AN: Good god, Sorry this took me so long to get to you. Hope I made it worth the wait! ^_^

Rachel wasn't a drinker by any means, but she was used to a glass of wine or tw0 accompanying dinner. She usually knew when to stop herself, and had no desire to drink any more than appropriate. However after two glasses of champagne, Rachel found that she no longer wanted to bother with a glass, and picked up the bottle. She didn't want to bother pretending she wasn't drinking to get at least a little bit drunk.

Puck was surprised Rachel had accepted the first glass, and even more surprised when she had accepted the second glass. But when she picked up the bottle, he couldn't believe it. Quinn had learned her lesson about drinking with him, and refused to even take a sip from the bottle, but Rachel apparently had not learned from Quinn. True, he had no...Well, that wasn't true. Puck had the desire to do a lot of things with Rachel, but nothing special. He wanted everyone he could get. Except ugly chicks.

"Woah there Rachel. Planning on leaving some for the rest of us?" Puck couldn't pretend he wasn't entertained by the drinking Rachel Berry, but he was still in this for himself. He may have been a few good, strong drinks ahead of her, but he wanted to keep that way. Plus he could already tell, Rachel Berry was out to be anything but herself tonight. As stupid as he acted, Puck could read a girl damn well. He always needed to know what would make it easiest to get in their pants. He always gave them exactly what they wanted. So it didn't take long for him to figure out that the last person Rachel wanted to be tonight was Rachel. Puck didn't know where he fit into this, but it wasn't like he had anything better to do. Plus, he was curious as hell to know what Rachel Berry was like drunk.

For a very long time, she didn't say anything. Just stared into the backyard, not sure what to think or do. But she could feel her head getting lighter. Somewhere along the way a smile crept onto her face, which was followed by a giggle. Everything was beginning to feel very funny and very far away. Rachel Berry was drunk.

Puck watched as she giggled over nothing. He was tipsy, for sure, but Rachel was drunk off her ass. He grabbed the bottle to see how much was left. It was empty. No wonder, he hadn't been watching her closely at all. Whatever that wasn't his job. Rachel was a big girl now.

"Noah..." Rachel turned to look at the boy sitting next to her. She had almost forgotten he was there. She knew this was a self pitying and stupid thing to do, but she didn't care. Slowly she pushed herself closer to him, intending to do all the things she had always wanted to do, but didn't. She had always admitted that she was attracted to Noah, and now, it didn't matter what happened. She was going to be a Lima loser, so why did it matter? She could do what she wanted now. 

Puck was more surprised than anyone when Rachel blatantly began coming on to him. He knew she had always wanted it, but he honestly never expected her to actually go for it. He wasn't going to deny her though. Nobody could resist Puckasaurus for too long. He truly was a sex god. But as Rachel drew closer he could smell the champagne on her breath. This was more familiar of a certain other night fueled by alcohol.

Rachel could feel his breath hot and sticky on her face. God, he was pretty. Really, really attractive...Just as she felt her lips brush against his, she also felt a hand on her chest holding her in place.

"Really, Noah?" The last thing she had expected was for him to be the one to stop it. "What, suddenly you've developed some thing _against_ getting girls drunk and..."

It had been a low blow, and the way he looked at her in the following moment cut straight through her drunken haze. She had touched a nerve. Nobody ever talked about the baby. Nobody. In the two years since, it was almost like she hadn't happened. Except for everyone knew she did. Sometimes, Rachel would catch Noah looking at Quinn in the same way she looked at Finn once. Wondering just what might have happened, or could have been. She had seen Noah angry before, and she had seen him sad, but this was something else. She didn't know whether to be terrified by him or saddened. Rachel settled on angry at being rejected.

Rather than say anything, Rachel tried to match his glare with her own, before silently pushing herself up from the porch. Looking down at him, Rachel tore her eyes away, and stomped off as best she could. The room was hazy before her, but she refused to slow down or stop until she was out of the party and on her way home.

Puck sat in silence, fuming. He knew Rachel Berry was crazy as hell, but he was used to her being more pathetic than anything. She spent all her time trying to be some big star and make everyone like her. She was annoying, and abrasive, but that...He didn't know anymore. But he knew that he didn't take shit, even from chick. He looked through the thinned crowd of the party, ready to get into it. Getting up from the porch, it didn't take long for him to find Mercedes, who told him Rachel had left. Once outside, he saw her walking exactly the wrong way home. He didn't care. In a few seconds he had caught up to her.

"What the fuck, Rachel?"

She turned around, not that surprised to see Noah about to let her have it. Now she was scared. But she was still an actress and she wasn't going to let that show. If he knew she was afraid then he would be winning the fight to easily.

"Come to reject me again?" She tried to play it off as cool as possible, despite a noticeable slur to her words. With a small smirk she turned to keep walking.

Noah sighed, and watched as she tried to walk a straight line. Not happening. Clenching his teeth he grabbed Rachel by the arm and turned her around.

"Are you really going to be a bitch right now?" He had had enough of women and their bullshit. But he also wasn't going to let her go off like that. Their fight here was far from over, but Puck had some sense of decency. With a sigh, he picked up Rachel in one fluid motion and turned around. By the time Rachel fully realized what was going on she was already being set down in his truck.

"What the hell are you doing? This is kidnap, I'll file a lawsuit..." Rachel continued to threaten and lecture as Puck went around to the driver's side. This was going to be one hell of a ride home and he was sure that Rachel was going to drive him crazy. Part of him doubted his decision, but he knew she wasn't getting home by herself.

"Rachel!" He cut off her rant abruptly. "Shut up." He started the engine as she folded her arms over her chest and pouted. Driving was one of may things he should have rethought, but it wasn't far to Rachel's house. Once he got her shut away at home he could crash in his truck for the night. He knew better than to show up drunk at home. Not when his mom was around.

By the time the truck pulled into her empty driveway, Rachel was half asleep. Tonight had been interesting, to say the least, and quite exhausting. She wasn't sure she liked being drunk very much. It was very much like being a child again. Which was a very funny thought. With a small giggle, she closed her eyes and hoped most of the night would just go away once she opened them. Instead she was greeted with a cool rush of air as Noah opened the passenger side door.

"C'mon sleepy, you're home."

"Mmm" Rachel protested, shaking her head slightly.

"Up."

"Nope.' Rachel protested with a little more force and added another giggle.

"Fine." Noah sighed and picked her up again. "Keys?"

"Under the rock...the really big one." Despite her less than optimal position, Rachel tried to make herself as comfortable as possible and got to sleep. She was so very tired. Just as she was drifting off she felt the familiar warmth of her bed.

She giggled again, sleepily and tugged at Noah's shirt as he tried to walk away.

"You care." She giggled one more time and drifted off.


	8. Chapter 8

AN:/ Another looong gap in-between chapters. Not the most eventful, but I wanted to get something up. I have a solid idea of where I want this to go, but getting there is the part I'm working on. So forgive me if some boredom (or just plain shittyness on my part) occurs. ...Please?

Rachel woke up the next morning to a splitting headache and the bittersweet feeling that accompanied knowing high school was finally over. She would never get slushied again or sit in glee or...any of it. She couldn't tell if she was relieved or saddened by that thought. Some mixture of both. With a small groan, she went downstairs to make her breakfast protein smoothie before getting on the treadmill. Why would that change? As she turned on the blender, she winced at the loud noise. She quietly drank her smoothie, wished her dads a good day at work and headed back upstairs. Something nagged at her. She remembered the champagne, and she remembered spending a lot of time with Noah, but the night was fuzzy. It wasn't hard to remember why she didn't like being drunk very much.

A couple blocks away from home, a very uncomfortable Puck tried, and failed to stretch out. God he hated sleeping in the truck. But then he thought about what would have happened if he had gone home. Ever since Quinn, his mother had pretty much zero trust in him. Puck hadn't knocked anyone else since then, but once was enough for her. It was days like this he looked forward to living in a dorm. Sure, sharing a room with another guy wasn't his favorite thought, but the pros outweighed the cons.

But for now, he was going to have to get some coffee and a shower, hopefully in that order. Rachel had better be buying him something nice as a thank you. It was then he fully realized, he was done. They might have been going to the same school in the fall, but it was very likely that his contact with Rachel Berry was done, let alone the people he actually wanted to see. She wasn't that bad sometimes, but it was strange to think that she would never spout off some random critique or self-promotion in Glee again. His headache cleared a little just thinking about it. Puck stretched as much as he could and headed for home.

Once she had finished her workout, showered and gotten dressed, Rachel wasn't quote sure what to do with herself. She was so used to having something to do for school or glee or college. But everything was as in order as it could be, given the circumstances. Every time Rachel thought about the future she felt a familiar stab of disappointment. She was tired of the self-pity. It had always been something she had done to a certain extent, but by now she was just sick of it. Maybe there wasn't anything she could change, but she wanted to focus on anything but the fall. Glancing around her room, she tried to find something that would take her out of her mind. MySpace...the guitar in the corner she hardly ever played...friends? She had escaped high school with acquaintances, but she wasn't sure she could deal with them. After all, she had just gotten away from them. What Rachel needed was some distance. As she flipped through her contacts, she stopped and hovered over Noah's name. She did need to thank him for last night...

Puck had never loved his bed more than he did right now. Last night hadn't been that bad at all, but he felt stupidly exhausted. With a glance at his phone, he shut the thing off and decided he would deal with the inevitable, Rachel 'thank you' call later. By now he knew she was up. Puck doubted that summer would slow Rachel down when it came to her schedule. He knew that sooner rather than later he would get some lengthy call. Maybe even some cookies. She baked exactly one thing, but she did it brilliantly. If he got cookies, it would be so worth it. With that thought in his mind he drifted off to sleep.

She came this close to hitting the call button before deciding against it. Relying on high school wouldn't solve anything. It was probably the last thing she needed. Against her usual pattern of behavior, she set the phone down and pushed it to the far corner of her nightstand. This was going to be harder than she thought. She didn't know if it was Noah or her manners, but not calling made her feel uncomfortable to not call.

Puck rolled out of bed around noon, feeling much more rested than before. He wandered downstairs, grabbing some pop tarts and went to listen to the rambling message that was sure to be on his phone by now. Should have points along the way such as 'why did you get me drink, it's bad for my vocal cords', 'thank you for not taking advantage of me, it shows you have grown as a person'. So he was feeling a little bit smug. Smugness was all he out of last night anyways. He wanted to sleep with Rachel about as much as he wanted to sleep with anyone else. There wasn't anything special about her, but he wasn't going to pretend like it hadn't taken some effort. Especially when she was practically begging for it.

But his phone was empty of messages. And she didn't call for the rest of the day. It bothered him more than he would have liked, but by then end of the week Puck had all but forgotten Rachel Berry.

Summer passed hot and sticky. Rachel hardly kept in contact with anyone from high school. Finn MySpaced her now and then, but there was no denying that they just didn't work so well together outside of school. She would always think of him fondly, but they had nothing in common outside of music. Her life was as uneventful, which was as to be expected. In some ways she was happy that way. But every once in awhile her mind would wander to the night after graduation. Rachel couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if he hadn't said no. It was hard to even imagine that happening. At the time, she remembered telling him that he cared. She knew better than that though. He didn't care. He just didn't want her.

Puck loved Summer. Absolutely fucking loved it. Pool cleaning, cougars, and then there were the other girls. He had been able to get a job as a lifeguard at the one local beach, thanks to one particularly helpful cougar. He definitely spent more time looking at the bikini-wearing girls than checking for people drowning. It was his busiest time of year so to speak.

Former and Current McKinley students stopped by pretty often. He was noticeable. Not only was he good looking but he was Puckzilla. Of course people noticed him. And somehow, he always found himself keeping an eye out for a certain brunette. She didn't show, and he was easily distracted by Santana. And Brittany. God, even their swimsuits were coordinated. Puck was going to miss them. But he also wasn't going to pretend it didn't sting a little bit that Brittany got an out of state cheerleading scholarship. God...the things she could do with that body. But for everything she had in the sexual department, she was stupid as fuck. There was no denying that.

Rachel was thoroughly surprised when she looked at her calendar and noticed it was the middle of July. Somehow time had gotten away from her. True she had been doing a certain amount of preparation for school, but she couldn't bring herself to care like she might have. Like she was going to New York. As much as she tried to remind herself that this was her future and that she didn't want to be self pitying or stupid, she couldn't help it. It simply wasn't the same. After one particularly frustrating day in which the University of Ohio insisted on educating her on the town she had grown up in and where she could go for fun, Rachel decided that she had had enough. Despite the fact that so many uv rays could be harmful to her skin Rachel decided she was going to the beach.


	9. Chapter 9

AN:/ Hey all. Not much to say, love to all of you fabulous people who favorite, alert, review or whatever it is you do to/with/for the story. Special shout out to GleeFreak-VampireChik, because you review every time I post a new chapter and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. :D

ALSO, still looking for a Beta. Somewhat desperately. I have a loose plan for this, but I need someone to watch me and make sure I don't get stuck in a writing rut.

This was generally the kind of place Rachel tried to avoid. There was exactly one good beach in Lima and _everyone_ went there. Running into people was the last thing she wanted to do, but Rachel was tired of hiding out. She had been doing that for most of her high school life. Health risks aside, she also realized that if she didn't go to places like this, she could likely go a whole summer without some frozen drink being thrown in her face. A fair trade, given the circumstances. But that was in the past now. Rachel had never been popular, not like Finn or Quinn or any of her other acquaintances, but she got through it. It wasn't so bad really. Sometimes she even missed it.

As she pulled into the small lot, Rachel felt herself go on guard. As much as she pretended it didn't bother her, she couldn't help but wonder...would she see anyone? What did it matter? She didn't have to prove anything to them anymore. She had done enough when she hadn't run off to New York. Still, she swiped on a layer of mascara and tried to put on a brave face. Despite her recent...struggles, Rachel tried to walk with the same confidence she always did. Her light pink swimsuit was dotted with gold stars. She felt a little bit stupid now. Like she didn't deserve it. But it was the mark of a truly good actress if she didn't show it. That was what her life had become. She was proving her acting skills. Or so she told herself. Rachel really wasn't sure of anything anymore.

With one last sigh, Rachel grabbed her book and towel and pulled her sunglasses down onto her face. UV rays were harmful to her skin, and as any good performer knew, looks were almost as much as talent. But some part of her knew that she wanted to go unnoticed. Once college started she could go right back to being Rachel Berry again. But for once, she just wanted to be a girl. It sucked.

Taking a preliminary scan of the beach, Rachel didn't see anyone she wouldn't want to. Which pretty much meant she didn't see anyone. They were sure to notice her anyways. Of course people cared. They wouldn't have singled her out everyday to throw slushies in her face if they didn't. Finn wouldn't have chosen her if he hadn't cared. It bothered her that something Puck had said was still bothering her. Despite his moments...he was still just malicious and bitter overall. He just got under her skin. The notion of wasted talent came to mind.

Puck was bored. Even girls in skimpy swimsuits weren't as satisfying right now. He needed something new to entertain him. Scanning the beach he saw some interesting prospects, but nothing too interesting. That was the one thing he missed about Quinn. She was always challenging. Sure getting into her pants was easy, but there was something to be said for the chase... He wondered if it would get this boring being in school. If he made his way through every attractive girl in Lima what then? It was a legit problem.

Settling in Rachel began to breathe easier. She wasn't going to be able to hide forever and it felt nice to be out. Somewhere where it didn't matter who she was or what school she was inevitably attending in a matter of weeks. With clenched teeth Rachel focused herself on her book. She needed to not think about real life right now.

Half an hour later, she was still failing miserably. Throwing the book down she stomped onto the edge of the dock they put in for lazy people and divers and plunged head first. Cold water washed over her, and for a second she forgot everything. It was great while it lasted. Once she resurfaced she was already gasping for air and farther out than she realized. But she kept going. The cold water was doing her good. She had forgotten just how much she liked swimming. It was relaxing...Something she had never been very good at it.

A sharp whistling sound snapped her out of her non-thought bubble. Turns out it was multiple whistles. Flipping off her back she began to tread water and look around. She was one of the last people left in the water. "Stupid safety breaks" she muttered to herself as she slowly began to swim back to the shore. She could tell that she was probably going to get reprimanded by some lifeguard who was concerned about her safety. Though Rachel followed the rules more often than not, she wanted to be left alone right now.

Puck felt significantly less bored as all the wet, bikini clad girls climbed out of the water for a safety break. Climbing down from his chair, he began to look at tonight's prospects, more than checking the water for drowning kids. Yeah, maybe he wasn't doing the best job in the world, but who could really blame him. A sharp "Puckerman!" from one of his coworkers brought his attention to a slowly approaching figure in the water. Some asshole had gone out too far and was holding up everyone else. With an eye-roll, he started out towards the shore to make sure the person wasn't drowning and to yell at them when they got here.

As Rachel climbed out of the water she could see a lifeguard head her way. She was in for it. Which really irked her more. She had been having such a lovely time, and clearly she wasn't dead, so if she promised not to do it again, shouldn't they overlook this one. Of course it wasn't fair to the other beach goers to continue the safety break just because she hadn't been paying attention. Really, this was just unnecessary. Still, she didn't like to be in trouble.

"Forget it, I got this one." said another lifeguard, Sam. He patted Puck on the shoulder as he passed on his way to the now land bound girl. Puck didn't give her a second glance as there were better...much better (he thought giving an eye to some nearby girls) prospects. God he loved this job.

Rachel braced herself for a lecture on beach safety. The guy was cute at least. That helped make it a little bit less dreadful. Once it was over, she began to scurry away from the beach as fast as possible. As she gathered her things she caught the eye of the last person she wanted to see. Noah Puckerman. Of course. What other summer job would allow him to wear little clothing and watch scantily clad women all day. She smiled lightly and waited momentarily for some sort of acknowledgement. It didn't come. Probably for the best. Though Rachel wanted to be liked by as many people as possible, she didn't need to see him. The last time had been under poor circumstances and she was sure he didn't want to see her. Pulling on her dress she darted towards the parking lot.

Once safely locked in her car she let out a breath she didn't know she was holding. Though Rachel could safely reason it a thousand ways, there was a part of her that wished he had noticed her in some small way. Despite her immediate, superficial needs, Rachel wanted nothing more then to be noticed. To be wanted in some way. She was having a difficult time with this.

Maybe forgetting him wasn't the way to do it. Maybe ignoring everything was stupid. Rachel decided that she would try to distract herself. More of this was a distraction from Noah. She would never admit it out loud, but he got into her head. Somehow she could relate to him, and seeing him again brought back some things...Or rather brought them to the forefront of her mind.

Yanking out her phone, Rachel dialed the number of the person she realized wouldn't ask her many questions. Finn always did get her. or so she liked to think. Sometimes she doubted just how much he was actually listening, but that didn't matter right now. All she was looking for was some company. Despite knowing better Rachel had been pitying herself and thinking in circles. True, this was common knowledge to her, but she was intent to do something about it now.

Puck decided that it wasn't Rachel Berry. He knew better, but he didn't want to deal with it. Over the summer she crossed his mind from time to time. He wondered if they would cross paths and if she even remembered that night. But Puck didn't wonder enough to care. He didn't want her in his mind. He was done with high school. Puck was bitter about how some things had gone down. The last thing he needed was some bullshit pep talk every five minutes. Maybe he would have to pull the slushie thing again. Not that that had ever stopped her before. But he was getting ahead of himself anyways.

Pulling on a shirt he turned his head to the perky brunette he had been talking to and smiled. e extended his hand to her, which she took eagerly. He led her to his truck, his hot tub and then his bed. All in all it was a good day.


	10. SORRY! Author's note

11:58

Hey there everyone. Sooooo, I owe you guys an explanation. I wish I had a really epic story for you, but the truth is rather boring. Long story short life got really busy and complicated for me for awhile.

BUT, I have returned! (Insert triumphant music here) And I have been writing, so I shall be posting at least one chapter (but quite probably more) in the next several days. They're all written and everything.

Thank you for being patient with me!


	11. Chapter 10

10:00

AN: Hey there all! Officially back with another chapter! Let me be the first to say WOOT WOOT! Also, a very large thank you to GingerGleek for Betaing this for me. :) Oh and, should you stumble upon the "review" button, it wouldn't be the *worst* thing ever if you were to review... :P

Rachel woke up exceptionally early on her first day of class. She loaded up on fruit and a protein shake before hitting the elliptical for an extra fifteen minutes. Today she was going to look as healthy and radiant as possible. Like a star. It might have just been the University of Ohio, but Rachel was still going to be a star. _The Star_. It would be too easy. There was no competition.

With a small sigh, Rachel curled the last piece of her hair into place and stepped back to look at the final product. Perfect as always, with each article of clothing, each accessory and hair perfectly placed, fitted and coordinated. Just like always, but she hopped people would appreciate her efforts more in college. Being a star wasn't just about talent. She had to look the part. It was a way of life. Not just anyone was capable of it, nor would they understand it.

Smile on her face, Rachel marched onto campus, ready to prove that she was going to make this work. She was ready and then some. The week before she had spent several hours making sure she knew the quickest routes to her classes, and thanks to several helpful books was well versed on college etiquette. Class was going to be the easy part. Rachel was ready to change her whole image. She was read to not be a freak, or any other of the names she was called. From now on she was going to be appreciated. Surely other theater students could understand her.

But by the end of the day Rachel was thoroughly underwhelmed. Of course she was. She had no idea how she had managed to convince herself that it would be anything other than underwhelming. It was just like high school, but with more people seeming to think it was appropriate to wear pajamas to class. At least nobody slushied her. That had been nice. At least it was a very small something. Right now she was pretty desperate for anything that would make her feel better. She felt her phone buzz in her pocket and was reminded by a good luck text message that she at least had a friend. Something she also wasn't entirely used to. A smile crept back on her face.

Puck had exactly zero expectations really. He figured it would be the same as McKinley, but it would be easier to get away with stuff. Most of the same people would be there anyways. Nobody would be that surprised to see him there. He might have been a Lima Loser, but Puck was still a badass. He wouldn't need to prove that to anyone at least.

So, with a smirk, Puck made his way through his first day of class. He never really tried in high school and he wasn't sure how much effort he was willing to put into college. Probably more than he had in high school, but he had no idea what he really wanted to do. Hopefully he would figure it out sooner or later. He could always just quit. He wanted to prove himself, but he had his limits.

For the first time in as long as he could remember, Puck went to all of his classes. An accomplishment, even if he only had three classes that day. All in all, he called it a good day. The only thing left to worry about was football. Well, that and how to work his way through the university cheerleaders without getting some sort of chick black mark. So far college was turning out to be exactly like high school, if not slightly better. It might have been Lima, but at least he could have a twelve pack of beer in his fridge without worrying about anyone finding it.

Rachel would cross his mind from time to time. He was surprised he hadn't seen her actually, since he had seen just about everyone else from McKinley. But she wouldn't be the type to spend much time in the places he was. She was probably busy finding as many new people as she could to outshine and annoy. But every once in a while he would see a flash of plaid and think that maybe it was her. A couple of times it ended up being someone hotter. Someone who would make any thought he had of Rachel disappear.

Rachel however, was too busy to think of Puck. She was trying as hard as she could to maintain a perfect GPA while finding local theater auditions. Maybe now that she was part of the University's theater department and thus knew the influential people in the local theater circuit she would actually get roles in plays. Not that there was really anything too exciting out there. The only reason local theater existed at all was because of the school and the department was limited, to say the least. But Columbus wasn't too far away. Maybe she could do a bit of traveling. She would have to get a car of course, but maybe with the money her dad's were saving on tuition...

She was starting to get frustrated. Rachel had spent so long thinking that once she got to college-or rather one she got to New York-things would be different. It was like an itch she had been told not to scratch Everyone knew she was wasting her life in Lima. But there wasn't really another option right now. So Rachel tried to keep her thoughts on the subject to herself as best she knew how.


	12. Chapter 11

AN: Not much to say to you this time. Continued thanks to my lovely beta!

Rachel Berry was nothing less than shocked. She had only been trying to improve the performance of the class as a whole – as a student dedicated to learning she felt it was her responsibility to ensure that everyone was performing to the best of their abilities. Professor Kreir did not see things the same way, evidently. She had thought that she was past being oppressed by teachers. So far college was turning out to bear a disappointing resemblance to high school.

Flouncing around the mall, Rachel tried to keep her head held high while rushing through as fast as she could. At least it wasn't as crowded as it could have been. Most students had class about this time of day, so she wouldn't have to face too many of her peers. But she could only imagine that the class would be buzzing about her unexpected departure.

Puck glanced at his phone before quietly slipping out of the lecture hall. That was the great thing about college, sit near the back and nobody noticed you were there in the first place, which meant he could duck out of lectures once he had given some sort of show of showing up. So far he was enjoying his "college experience". But in about twenty minutes it was about to get a whole lot better. College cheerleaders just had something high school cheerleaders didn't. Maybe it was the uniforms. They were tighter, shorter and usually involved only about half of a shirt. They were really helpful for quickies. But if he had his way this would be a long afternoon in the best way.

He bolted across campus, more than ready to be in his dorm room – and his cheerleader...He couldn't quite remember her name entirely, but she had been the one to suggest this afternoon hook-up. Puck was trying to be a decent guy, so he was going to at least try to figure out her name before setting something up – but she had texted him and who was he to say no? No guy would have, not even Finn. But then again, Finn had more game than Puck once thought he had. Not that getting Santana was difficult, but Puck had been surprised by that. And after breaking up with Rachel, Finn had gotten some pretty decent chicks.

Just as Puck had finished the thought, he looked up to see what was, for sure this time, Rachel marching towards him. He knew that stomp well; she was on the war path. A path he was standing in. But there was no way she could be mad at him. They hadn't spoken in months...but Rachel was sort of insane, which meant she might have come up with some reason. Unfortunately, Puck had no other choice but to just keep walking and hope to God that she didn't notice.

Rachel didn't notice him at all, which was why she ran into him. No escaping now. He was sure she would realize it was him and then try to strike up a discussion on how she was improving the school through song or whatever it was she was doing. If there hadn't been sex on the line, he might have stopped, but instead Puck stepped to the side and continued on his was as fast as he possibly could.

Rachel stopped and blinked once or twice. She hadn't been expecting to hit anyone else on her mad dash home. But of all the people she hadn't been expecting, she had least expected Puck. Of all the times...Rachel always imagined what it would be like to run into one of her old classmates again. But she always imagined it would be different. With her as the triumphant star of a wildly successful Broadway show. Even now, she still imagined herself at least looking stunning and proving that there had been some sort of mistake in her being stuck here. Granted, Rachel seriously doubted Puck had paid any attention to her. She remembered when they had been...closer, at least. They had never really been _friends_, even when they were together. She had long since given up hope that he would ever fully be the Noah she wanted him to be. But she at least hoped that he might notice that something had been wrong if they had to meet that way.

There was really no point in wasting her time pretending that there had been something to the interaction. So she continued to hurry home to hide from the world. But still, somewhere in the very back corners of her mind, Rachel wondered if Puck was wondering about her.

Puck tugged his pants back on and easily decided that his afternoon class wouldn't be worth it. He had gone to all the morning ones, anyway. And he was tired now. (It had been a _very_ productive afternoon.)

Leaning over the girl still lying tangled in the sheets, he kissed her quickly and smiled the smile he always used on girls. The one that made him seem like he really meant what he was going to say. Charming; but just a little bit devilish, because no matter what, he was still a badass. That was what made them want him in the first place. How he got Cheerios to give up their chastity vows. Not that most of them really meant it in the first place. Quinn was captain of the squad and the rest of them did what she did; even Santana. But even Quinn had given in to him eventually. She wasn't just another conquest – that had been different. But there was no denying that she had still been won over by Puckzilla.

"My roommate's gonna be home soon babe. I know it sucks, but he's not so cool with the idea of having girls in the room."

His speech didn't go off as well as he had planned.

"Girls?"

Damn, this was not one of his superior speeches, and Puck had given a lot of these, ever since he and Santana had first done it when he was fourteen. It hadn't taken him long to realize that it was much,_much _better when they just wanted to get the hell out. That was why he ended up with Santana. But despite her merits, Santana was still proof that girls were not reasonable creatures. So he figured he was already fucked (literally and metaphorically) so he may as well just get her out of here as fast as he could.

It didn't take long at all before she was cursing him and gathering her clothes as fast as she could. He would have liked to keep things friendly, but she wasn't_ that _good. Plus she was gone much faster this way. Which meant he was free to crack open a beer and relax for the rest of the afternoon.

As he drank, Puck thumbed through the contacts in his phone absent-mindedly. When he came to Rachel's name he was reminded of how glad he was that he hadn't been forced to stop and listen to her inevitable story about whatever had happened. In fact he wondered why she was even still in here. He was sure she was going to have nothing to do with him now that they weren't forced together all the time. But maybe one of these days she would actually get rejected enough times to just put the fuck out already.

Rachel sat in the den, glass of wine in hand, and contemplated Puck. She really hadn't expected to see him. She didn't know why since it was surprising Lima even warranted having a college campus, even if it was tiny. She wondered if he had even realized it was her. But he must have. Rachel knew that Puck would avoid her like the plague. Despite their several dalliances, he never did want to spend time with her when he really wasn't trying to prove some sort of point about his decency or in Glee club. But she toyed with the idea of what would have happened if he had bothered to talk with her. She really didn't expect it, but she knew that somewhere in the back of her mind she had hoped for it. It would have been nice to be comforted. Of course in most of her fantasies about running into Puck, she usually looked stunning and was just leaving opening night of the play in which she was starring in...

Puck always was comforting to have around when it was just the two of them. At times she almost gave into his sexual advances. It would have been far from the perfect time she had always envisioned for herself and Finn (And for awhile Jesse...and then back to Finn). But things had a way of not working out like she wanted them too. A perfectionist to the bone, Rachel wouldn't accept anything less than the night she had built up so much in her mind. But it was nice to at least be wanted. She thought that that was the most appealing thing about sex. If there was one thing Rachel wanted, it was to be wanted.


	13. Chapter 12

AN: Yes, I have been gone a very long time. I am still sorry about this! I'm going to try to keep this as regular as I can, but by now I'm sure you all know that I am not so reliable. It's not because I don't love you (I do), but rather because life is a bitch sometimes. Okay, done rambling now.

Rachel made a decision. She was going to try and fit in. After all, she should be used to being told not to shine so brightly so that her peers could feel better. Maybe that was the key to this. After all, trying to make the best of it didn't seem to be working. Maybe if she faded into the background everyone would realize how much they needed her to lead them.

So no more correcting people, and no more helping to improve the quality of the vocal and acting work. No more trying really-not that she had been given anything truly challenging yet. Once more, Rachel also decided to retire her wardrobe as she remembered receiving positive feedback the other times she had tried this. So after extensive internet research on what the average college student wore, Rachel pushed her animal sweaters to the back of her closet. Except the one with the owl. And one or two of the horse ones-since she loved them so much. With enough digging she eventually found the ample supply of "normal" clothes she had for glee numbers and the other times she had tried to change. as dedicated as she was, Rachel could not bring herself to wear the customary school sweatpants and sweatshirt combinations she viewed so many of her classmates wearing day after day. Presentation was important.

So she dressed herself as "normally" as possible, and blended her voice and kept her improvements to herself. She wasn't sure if she was happy or disappointed that it was working. After several days she had hoped that someone would have noticed by then. At least about the wardrobe, as that seemed to be what most people cared about in high school.

It was getting hard to sleep a night. After several weeks of her plans of blending in going a little too well in the sense that _still nobody had noticed_. She could sense that her blood was beginning to boil. Rachel was a very large fish in a very small pond. Rachel was exhausted, bored, restless and furious about all of this. Even Mr. Shuester had never pushed her this far and there wasn't much love lost between them.

With a little luck she would hear back from either the head of the theater or music department about using the auditorium for practice. She had presented perfectly organized power-point presentations to both, so there was no question in her mind that she would be granted access, but she was tired of waiting, especially with the impending auditions for Evita. For the first time since starting college, Rachel felt she had something to look forward to. It was obvious through careful examination of her competition that she was guaranteed the lead role. She had been preparing for this since her first day of kindergarten. There was no question in her mind. But still, she was a perfectionist and wanted nothing more than the empty.

As she finished "_What I Did For Love"_ Rachel knew in her bones that she had been perfect. She knew that this was _her_ role. Not only did she have the vocal and acting ability, but she was racially ambiguous, meaning she could easily play a multitude of nationalities, and give the theater department the satisfaction of knowing they had a diverse appearing cast. A fact she had not hesitated to point out to the director.

It was no surprise when she saw her name at the top of the callback list. For the first time in a good while, a genuine smile crossed her face. At least _something_ was going just how she had planned it. The way everything else should have been going. This would do, for now at least. Between her ability to cry on command and her demonstration of just how well she could perform death scenes, Rachel knew she had surpassed the competition by miles. With ease and confidence, Rachel marched up to the cast list a week later and zeroed in on her name.

Rachel's eyes widened and she had to blink several times before being convinced she hadn't misread the list. Before she had time to think about it she tore the list down and stomped to the director's office.

"Excuse me, Professor Forrer, I think there's been a mistake. I believe I was very clear in expressing my desire to play Eva Peron."

Taking the paper from her, Professor Forrer sighed heavily. As he began to speak he made sure to stay calm, but still ensure that she would understand what he was saying and that his word was final.

"You're very talented Rachel, but there's more to it. Your attitude today has only confirmed that you aren't anywhere near ready to take on such a major role. You need to pay your dues and learn to respect that you are not always going to get your way. Despite my better judgment I am willing to let you keep the role I have cast you in, but make no mistake. You will be on probation. Any more outbursts and you will no longer be a part of this production, and I will remind you that your future in the theater department may be jeopardized by such temper tantrums. Any number of girls would be more than happy to play your role. You are easy to replace, should you force me to do so."

With that, he knew there was no need to say anything else and simply returned to his work.

Rachel stood open mouthed for a moment before turning to scamper out of the office as fast as she possibly could. This was not the way she had intended to start her winter break. Even the softly falling snow, the kind that promised a picturesque holiday didn't phase her. Rachel had never felt so humiliated in her entire life.

Pausing only to shove her headphones in her ears, Rachel began to walk home. It was a dramatic move, but Rachel felt that only by arriving home covered in snow and most likely soaked to the bone could she correctly convey her story with the proper tone and appearance to her dads. There had to be some sort of action taken.

Puck stared out the window as snow began to fall. It took everything in him not to check the clock for the tenth time that minute. He missed the days when he just didn't go to class. Then he didn't have to sit through the torture of the last class before a vacation. Still, he had made it this far and things didn't completely suck. College was surprisingly alright. He wasn't thrilled about the class parts, but he dealt with it since it was easier to get beer here.

By the time Puck got to his truck the snow had really picked up. One quick stop to the dorm to pick up all the laundry he'd been saving for his mom and he would be on his way home for Hanukkah. His mouth was already watering at the thought of all the food. All the food that wasn't ramen noodles and easy mac. With a little luck the Chinese food would already be on the tv trays waiting for him. With a lot of luck the movie would already be in the dvd player and he could skip the awkward questions about his "extracurricular" activities.

The drive home was slow, the snow and the flood of kids trying to get off campus meant he had a lot of time to check out girls. Winter was never his favorite season. Thank god most girls were to worried about how they looked to wear practical winter clothes. He really appreciated the fact that leggings alone were now standard winter gear, but still, nothing could come close to the skimpy clothes from the summer.

But the winter break meant that Santana would be home for about a week. She wasn't happy about it, but he would make her forget about it the best way he knew how. He would be glad to be stuck here with someone else. As good as things were, Puck was still bitter about being stuck here for the next four years of his life, and probably the next forty after that. He was going to be a Lima loser, college or no. Puck was almost ready to accept that, but he was going to be a fucking _stud_ if he was going to be stuck here.

The thought of his reunion with Santana, the snow and the ice made it impossible for him to notice the girl who had decided she was too good for crosswalks. Yanking his wheel as hard as he could, Puck stomped the breaks and braced himself as the truck pulled a 360. The minute it stopped he got out to apologize or make sure she would never forget what a crosswalk was again. It really depended on how hot she was.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Oh god, of course he had almost hit Rachel. Of course. Whatever she could possibly say to him would be the last thing he needed and the first thing he expected. Probably something about driver safety and pedestrian rights or whatever. It would all be standard Rachel, he knew what was in store. Until she said that. Puck was sure he had never heard Rachel day anything stronger than damn in all of his life. He would be mad too if he had been her, but he was also mad this way. For once in his life he would have a leg up on Rachel Berry in an argument since they were standing in the middle of the street. Normally he would just insult her and hope she would go away.

"I have no fucking idea how you have managed to maintain a drivers license, but you better fucking lawyer up because I will be doing everything I am capable of to ensure that you lose it!"

Rachel continued to rant and use words he didn't even know she knew. He tuned most of it out, out of sheer shock. This was unbelievable. Everyone knew that Rachel Berry was going to crack one day. Hell, he had been hell-bent on making her crack for a very ling time. Puck had to admit that he was impressed by how damage- proof Rachel was. She had been used and dumped and cheated on and called names and had slushies thrown in her face. Sure, Rachel did deserve a lot of it, but was some sort of superhuman who would sing herself a song and come back the next day with a huge smile.

Finally Puck decided he needed to shut her up and he had only ever known one way to do that. Taking a deep breath he hoped this would work and hoped it wouldn't cause him any problems later. He crossed the distance between then and covered her mouth with his.


End file.
